Tuesday, 17 March 2009
Who Am I?
Sometimes it hits me that I simply cannot put my feelings or my personal traits in one file box or another to be classified and done with. I'm not always pleased with it. Sometimes I feel our identity is just another vague and blurry element added to the uncertainty of our lives.
Yes, I'd like to say I'm nice. I guess I usually am. Except for when I'm not, that is. When I am ready for a word fight or incredibly good at finding flaws in good things. And saying something about that out loud. AND I KNOW it takes so little to make people smile. And you take so much when you spread negative energy.
I'm painfully honest. Well, not really. I lie sometimes. Lying is really not my thing, but ... do you know the feeling when you simply don't want to be bothered with small things that would make you look stupid or worse than they think you are? A small lie... to them or to me?
But I AM painfully honest. I'm not good at lying. In fact, I'll tell you the truth even when you would prefer something else. Anything else. It doesn't help to hit my head afterwords. Feelings have been hurt. Ouch. Sorry, I didn't mean to. Another lie - of course I did.
I'm hardworking. Yeah right! I can do quite some work and do it well when I feel like it. But when I don't, I can be a regular couch potato or a potato rolling round my own an other blogs. I'm brilliant at finding excuses - you know, this is a perfect writing and language exercise (except the mistakes don't get marked in red or corrected).
I have a sense of humour. Really? Who's laughing? I guess I must have outgrown it...
I'm ... what else am I?
I guess I'm an ordinary minestrone soup of personal traits, feelings, flaws and virtues. Yep, that must be it.